旻弈大人请振作 orz

真希望自己能够做到五蠹不侵的境界。每次警惕了自己的事、答应了自己要卸下的包袱，始终不能乖乖地将之放下。虽然这种期待是快乐的，但是沉默太久回首反省时，又有种说不出所以然的失落感，笑问一切是否值得时更是自责。放下，真的是一门学问。很多时候都会睹物思人、触景生情，沉溺在以往的欢笑，有时又会一直活在对未来计划的憧憬中，因之忘了把握当下。真是目光浅短，呜呼哀哉！>.<


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啊啊啊~~ 全能的水旻弈，请振作点！！！

Mortals

Have actually been pondering on so many things lately. So many things, that I'm too lazy to write that down. Friendship, relationship, kinship, passion, all the mortal stuff in this world. So many things arose, that forced me into accepting the fact (again) that nothing's absolute. Even if it's long lost friend, that nowadays you don't find the passion in contacting each other anymore, it doesn't absolutely mean you hate him/her. Vice versa. Environment changes, forcing people to change. Everything seems so fragile.

That very pessimistic idea has once brought me into believing that it's best not to put in too much of passion into anything. The wisest thing to do is to keep a balance. Too much of pessimism makes someone passive, unambitious and dull. Be passionate in everything we do, yet not to let anything harm us. The only non-evolving theory is “evolution” itself. Don't be too depressed over something, at the same time, don't be overjoyed. Sounds like a philosopher, sounds like acting wise, but these are the points that I've been demanding myself to achieve this.

Life's been boring as well lately. Sigh. I know that actually depends on how wise I intend it to be, but, sigh, really have no idea since when I've turned into man with thousand worries. >.< (Sighing twice within a sentence doesn't sound like a good start though) Hope I can awesomely survive this month, before more “FUN” awaits!

But above all, I still believe in certain immortal things that I can still have faith in. Religion, which is a very subjective idea, that so long you believe in your own God's existence, He'll always be there; parents' love which is always the purest; and myself.

Mom's talk about having siblings =.=

Me: Mom, how is it like to have siblings?

Mom: Biasa lah. Nothing special.

Me: ??

Mom: When you're young, siblings can play with you. But as everyone grow, everyone'll be focusing on their lives. In the end, have siblings = no siblings. It's the same!

Me: Oooh.


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This is not the answer I was expecting laaa mom. >.<

Blessed kid don't ask for more yea

Totally sleepless yesterday night though was really tired. >.<

Neeway, this is a reflection (the sound of it reminds me of reflective writing for PPD >.<) from yesterday's low-quality sleep. I've been unhappy for not having autonomy on everything. Come to think of it, I shouldn't really been complaining on over-protective parents when a lot of orphans don't even get to know their parents. Lotsa miracles have happened to me, deadliest Bio improved from C5 to A1 in high school, getting a seemingly prosperous course in an average local uni, and passed 1st anatomy exam, etc. O.o So I should really eliminate the thought of quitting my course just because I prefer a more relaxing life later. I asked for it, so should now behave and continue what I've started. I'm really grateful for the blessings and miracles and should then not demand for any more stuff.

Getting a house to stay in is already lucky enough, so stop complaining about home; getting enough (sometimes more than enough, though) food is good enough, so stop complaining about gaining weight; and the list goes on. Hope I don't sound like an ah-ma but All in all, just be grateful for everything you have. (am telling myself that, too)..

Cheers.. :D (though am really depressed with the dark circles around my eyes)

New Start!

I've always distrusted blogs. All these while I thought, if it's diary, it should be confidential shouldn't it. The idea of publishing diaries had been weird to me. But come to think of it, getting comments might not be a bad idea. Keeping diaries, burying everything inside a lil book sometimes doesn't help much. 'Coz in the end you're still thinking from that point of view, you're still entrapped there. So, here comes my 1st post! =)